Week 48- Heather Ouellette-Cygan

Posted: February 29, 2012 in Heather Ouellette-Cygan, Week 48

 Merely Players: Part One


“What a motley-looking bunch of ragtag excuses for actors. How long does it take to fill out a bloody form?” Nigel threw down the pencil he had been tapping on the long, simulated-woodgrain table that he shared with both his assistant director and costume designer and once again stood to get a look at the measly numbers who had arrived for this first night of auditions.

“Two, four, six.” He mouthed as he counted those who were nervously sitting in the chairs that would later house an audience for this production. As he ended with twenty-five, he made eye contact with a middle aged woman in a pink kitten sweatshirt. His mouth struggled against a sneer and achieved a meager smile at the woman.

“God, are those bloody kittens wearing fucking cowboy hats?” he whispered to Claudia, the assistant director. He strained his eyes, which recoiled in disgust. All five of the kittens were indeed wearing a variety of styles of that American atrocity, the cowboy hat.  “There is no part in this play for her,” he continued as he made note of the way the kitten’s faces were stretched across the woman’s ample breasts. He became even more disturbed as he noticed that each tabby colored kitten was also clad in cowboy boots.

“This play shall be absolute disaster. Absolute.” These words he quietly mouthed to himself.

He cleared his throat and tried to pretend that he was alright. “Okay everyone, in just a moment I will start asking you to move forward onto the stage to deliver your lines. Have you all had time to fill in your audition sheets?”

Nigel noted the blank stares returning to him from the first timers in the audience. For the love of God, how hard was it to answer a few simple questions on a slip of paper. He scanned the group. Only five people raised their hands.They were all cast members from previous plays. “Thank God, Marcia is here again. Oh, and Brian.” At least he would be able to cast a couple of the larger roles with some experience.

He continued to the group auditioning, “Those of you who have not, please do so now. Then, bring them forward and hand them to Claudia, so that we can get started.” He looked down to Claudia, who half stood up, turned and waved limply. She then sat back down and continued to riffle through the audition sheets she had already collected. Nigel noticed how her silver bob glistened as her head turned to scan each paper.

At least there is one other competent person here, he thought as a stream of first timers worked their way to the front, arms outstretched in Boris Karloff Frankenstein fashion, to pass in their forms.


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